back next"Okay, so... because of what happened between us, I don't want there to ever be any secrets or lies anymore, so I wanna tell you what happened yesterday," Dirt said to Brian as they sipped their coffees together at their favorite cafe.
Brian simply nodded, signaling for them to continue. "So..." Dirt sighed. "Daisy's ex didn't break into their apartment. It was Salem..."
Brian stared at him, shocked, his mouth hung slightly open. "I figured it out pretty much right away. He'd said he wanted to get revenge on her for posting those videos of him."
"Uh... Wow..." Brian said, utterly speechless.
"Yeah, I know," Dirt laughed nervously. "I was so mad at him, that in the moment I just.. told him to leave. I told him not to get revenge, and he did anyway. And when he came home that morning, with glass cuts on his face, he told me he was attacked by seagulls!" It still got him a little riled up to think about.
Brian snorted. "Pfft—Sorry, but.. seagulls?" he chuckled.
"Yeah, no, I know.. But apparently he actually was attacked by seagulls when he was a kid, which is why he was able to lie about it so well, I guess!" Dirt laughed a little. "Anyways.. Once he left, I instantly regretted it. I wanted to be mad! Part of me still does! I dunno..." Dirt sighed. "Sarah and I found him at his sister's husband's house and we both apologized to each other and shit. And fuckin' Sarah even thinks that Daisy deserved it! Did not fuckin' expect that from her at ALL. She gets upset when I make fun of cringey youtube videos!" Brian laughed at that.
"Um. Wow," Brian repeated, "I... have no idea what to say to that."
"Yeah, It's crazy, I know.. I just didn't wanna keep that from you. I don't wanna keep anything from you anymore," Dirt said softly.
"Well... Thank you for tellin' me, I guess? Shit, bro that's fucked up.. I feel bad for Daisy..."
"Yeah, I just don't know what I should do! Like, should I tell her? And help replace her shit? I'm still pretty mad at them for what they did!" Dirt took a big swig of his coffee.
Brian looked just as stumped as Dirt. "I dunno, man. It's hard to quantify this shit, y'know? Like, Salem physically broke into her place and destroyed her shit, but also, she did the equivalent of outing him to millions of strangers?"
"Yeah! Exactly! I don't know where to go from here!"
Brian shrugged. "I guess just... Do nothing? I mean Daisy said they'd figure out... They think their ex did it... For now, it is what is it, I guess."
Dirt laughed dryly. "Hah.." he shook his head, "I fuckin' guess so, man... I kind of expected you to like, tell me to come clean to her!"
"I don't know, dude! This shit's fuckin' wild! I mean, really it's between her and Salem, not you, y'know?" Brian said, taking a tiny little sip of his beverage.
"I guess... I just kinda feel like Salem is like... sort of my responsibility?" Dirt shrugged.
"Nah, man... If he's got the wherewithall to fuckin' b&e for revenge, even after bein' told not to? I think this one's pretty much out of your hands, I mean... What else could you have done, y'know?" Brian reasoned. Dirt sighed, and took another swig of coffee while wishing he was currently smoking weed.
"Wanna come over and smoke some weed?" he asked.
"Hell yeah, bro," Brian smiled, and the two of them left the cafe together.
They had met up there, Dirt biked and Brian walked, so Brian had to ride on Dirt's pegs again. He held onto Dirt's shoulders, obviously trying to keep some distance between their bodies. Dirt tried not to let it get to him.
When they got to Dirt's house, Salem greeted them both excitedly. "Brian!!!! You're back!!!!" he exclaimed, latching onto Brian's arm and nuzzling against it. Brian laughed uncomfortably and awkwardly patted Salem's head. "Are you guys back together?!" he asked cheerfully.
"We're just friends, Salem," Dirt said quickly.
"Oh," Salem scowled disappointedly. "Well anyways I have a couple of joints rolled up... I guess me and Dirt can share, since you're allergic to him now..."
"Dude! Cut it out!" Dirt scolded, hitting him on the shoulder. "I'm so sorry about him..."
"It's fine," Brian laughed, "We can all share, bro. Pass around one joint at a time?" he suggested.
"Yeah, sure, whatever," Salem sighed as he led everyone to Dirt's bedroom.
"Sorry," Dirt whispered.
Salem opened up the window as Dirt went into his drawer and grabbed his Teen Titans lunchbox where the joints were stored. He took out one of the Salem-rolled joints as well as a lighter, and sat on his bed next to Brian. Salem squeezed himself in between them, making them both scoot over a couple inches for him to fit.
"Here, why don't you start it, bro?" Dirt said, handing the joint and lighter to Brian.
"Thanks," Brian smiled.
As the three of them passed the joint around, nobody spoke. Salem crossed his arms whenever his hands were free, huffing passive aggressively.
"You don't have to be in here if you're upset, man," Dirt finally said in frustration, but was also kind of laughing since he was high. Salem just rolled his eyes and took the joint from Dirt.
"Are you mad at me, dude?" Brian asked Salem.
"Ugggghhh," Salem groaned, flicking his tail in annoyance, "No, like, it's fine. Like it's your prerogative or whatever. Whatever, it's not my business anyway, I guess," he said, then took a huge a hit from the joint before passing it to Brian.
Brian looked at Dirt in uncertainty. Dirt just shrugged and mouthed, "Sorry..." Brian shrugged back and took a couple of hits from the joint, then passed it back over to Dirt.
Salem let out a big, long sigh, "Ugghh I'm weed horny now. I'm gonna go jerk off in the bathroom. Later, losers," he said, skittering out of the room. Brian laughed as Dirt blushed, covering his hands with his face and groaning.
"I am.. so sorry, bro," Dirt apologized, "He just doesn't understand that polyamory isn't for everyone and he's pissed that some people don't agree with him, I guess..."
"It's alright, it's kinda funny," Brian chuckled.
Dirt chuckled back nervously, "You think so?"
"Yeah, like... He's really putin' the 'cat' in 'catboy,' y'know? It's cute," Brian smiled, laughing a little.
"Heh.. Yeah..." Dirt said, a blissful smile on his face as he stared into the distance. He then realized he was still holding the joint, and quickly handed it back to Brian.
"He really makes you happy, doesn't he?" Brian asked with a sad smile. Dirt was having a hard time reading his tone and expression. How was he supposed to answer that...? Did he even want an answer?
"Y...you make me happy too, bro...." he said stupidly.
Brian clicked his tongue, "C'mon man..."
"Sorry..." Dirt sighed. "This is hard..." He looked down at his lap sadly. Brian finished off the joint and set it down in the ashtray, resting his hands in his lap.
"Is this a mistake? Being just friends again?" Brian lamented.
"What? No! I-I don't think it is!" Dirt stuttered frantically, "Do you?" His heart was beating too fast, the weed amplifying his feelings of anxiety.
Brian sighed. "I just... It feels kinda stupid, y'know? Like maybe I'm wrong..."
"Wrong about what?"
"Man, like... Even your boyfriend wants me to date you! And I feel like... like I should just suck it up because I.. love you.." Brian mumbled the last bit.
"No, dude, I don't want you to do anything you're uncomfortable with! I'm happy being friends with you. I don't need anything else, I just want you!" Dirt assured him. "I just need more time to feel out where our boundaries are now..."
"Yeah, that's the thing, though. We didn't used to have boundaries. Now I feel like I'm.. hiding part of myself when I'm with you, and it feels wrong..." Brian's voice broke. Fuck no please don't cry, if you cry I'll cry! "Shit.. weed's got my emotions all crazy," he sniffled.
Dirt wanted so badly to comfort him, to wrap their arms around him, to rub his shoulders and kiss his face. "Can I hold your hand?" he asked instead. Brian nodded wordlessly, and Dirt immediately grabbed his hand, lacing their fingers together, rubbing the back of his hand with their thumb. "You don't have to hide any part of yourself with me, bro. I love you."
When he saw tears rolling down Brian's cheeks, Dirt realized he'd never seen him cry before. "Brian..." Dirt moved closer to him, pressing their shoulders together. Brian looked up at him, biting his lips together, his eyebrows knit together in misery.
In one clunky, forced motion, Brian took Dirt's face in his free hand and kissed him. His tears wet Dirt's cheeks, but they didn't care. They enthusiastically kissed him back, squeezing his hand tighter. With his eyes closed, Dirt felt like the room was spinning as Brian deepened the kiss, his hand moving to the back of their head as he moved ever closer, pressing his chest against Dirt's.
But as quickly as it began, it was abruptly put to and end, as Brian suddenly pulled away, leaving Dirt looking dazed and shocked. They laughed nervously, right as the bedroom door opened.
"You guys better not have started the other joint without me," Salem said as he entered the room. "Woah..." he muttered, stopping in his tracks. "What happened in here? You both smell like hell..." he asked as he eyed them both suspiciously.
"I mean we been smokin' weed..." Brian said.
Salem shook his head, "No, no, not THAT... I mean you're both giving off fear pheromones," he clarified. Dirt and Brian shared an anxious glance, quickly looking away from each other in embarrassment. Salem gasped, "YOU KISSED, DIDN'T YOU!"
"What the FUCK???" Brian bleated, "Are you fuckin' witch, bro???"
"HA!! OH MY GOD! Just had to leave you two alone in a stable like a couple of horses, huh?" Salem joked. Dirt groaned, and pulled his knees inward, covering his face with his hands again. "Can I kiss you too, Brian? :3" Salem flirted.
"What?? No! No, I'm just— it was just an impulsive—I'm just HIGH! I.. I didn't mean to.. UGHH!!" Brian groaned in frustration and confusion, flopping onto his back.
"Psshh! Impulsively kissing your bestie, bro? Your bestie who you're in love with, bro? SURE you 'didn't mean to' fucking LAWL," Salem relentlessly teased.
"Salem, PLEASE," Dirt yelped, "This is NOT the time!"
"No, no, let's talk about this! This is interesting!" Salem chirped excitedly. "I'm assuming Brian initiated the kiss, yes?"
"Dude, can you not? This is none of your business!" Dirt complained. Salem rolled his eyes.
"Come ooonn! Just let be your impartial mediator while you talk about your feelings!" he beamed, clasping his hands together, evoking the imagery of being a saint in a religious painting.
"You're not impartial, though," Dirt pointed out, frustratedly, "You have very clearly stated your strong opinions on the matter!"
Brian burst out into laughter, making Dirt and Salem snap their heads towards him. "Oh my god.. This is ridiculous..." he wheezed. "C'mere, Salem. Let's all smoke that other joint," he said, beckoning to Salem.
Salem gave Dirt the most shit-eatingest grin he could conjure before trotting over to sit between him and Brian again. Brian reached over to the desk where Dirt's lunchbox still sat open, and grabbed the other joint, handing it to Salem along with the lighter. "Here, buddy," he smiled, "you go first." Salem grinned, his eyes gleaming as he accepted Brian's offering.
They each took a couple hits off the joint before continuing their conversation. "Ahem," Salem cleared his throat, "So Brian... What is it you want from your relationship with Dirt?"
Dirt laughed, "What are you, a couple's counselor?" he teased. Salem side-eyed him.
"I was talking to Brian, Dirt..." he scoffed.
"I just want things to go back to normal," Brian answered earnestly.
"And what would this 'normal' be to you?" Salem inquired, pretending to be all sophisticated. Dirt couldn't help but chuckle.
Brian giggled a little as well before answering, "I just wanna be able to be myself, like, fully. Like how I used to be able to be with him... But I feel like I'm holdin' back now that we're Just Friends again."
"Mhmm... So, what I'm hearing is... You want to get back together," Salem said cheekily as he tapped his chin.
"I mean....." Brian let out a big sigh, "Kind of, but..."
"But you feel... threatened by my presence?" Salem interjected.
"Threatened? No, not at all. I guess I'm mostly just... I dunno, not comfortable with.. Sharing him, or whatever..." he admitted.
"I see.. You want him all to yourself. That's cute," Salem chirped. Brian shrugged sheepishly. "Hmm... This is a tough nut to bust, I must admit..."
"Nut to crack, Salem," Dirt corrected through laughter.
"I said what I said," Salem shot back, as he took the joint from Dirt, and took a long drag off of it as he looked into the middle distance like a detective smoking a pipe as they worked on a case. "I have a suggestion to remedy this concern of yours, Brian," said Salem, strained as he held back a coughing fit.
"And what's that?" Brian asked, amused.
"If we become a throuple, then we'll ALL be sharing each other!" Salem excitedly announced. "Then it wouldn't just be me and you sharing Dirt, but also you and Dirt sharing me, and me and Dirt sharing you! All balanced out!"
"Oh my god," Dirt grumbled, again covering his face, laughing in embarrassment.
Brian giggled adorably, and reached for the joint as Salem passed it back to him. "That's cute, Salem, but I don't feel that way about you. Sorry, buddy."
"Pssh. Whatever. I don't feel that way about you either, idiot," Salem retorted, blushing, "It was just a SUGGESTION!"
"Tch.. Alright, man..." Brian chuckled, handing the joint over to Dirt.
"Ugh, this is so frustrating! I just don't GET it!" Salem bemoaned, getting off the bed to pace the room. "You both love each other, so why don't you just! Ugh!!" he whined.
"Salem, stop it," Dirt tersely commanded. "Try to think about it from his perspective."
"I AM THINKING ABOUT IT FROM HIS PERSPECTIVE! We are literally in the SAME spot! We'd BOTH be sharing you!" he complained, exasperated.
Dirt sighed. He was so tired of this. "Here," he said, handing Salem the joint, "I don't want any more. Can we please just stop talking about this?" he pleaded.
"But we haven't reached a conclusion! Nothing has been solved!" Salem lamented. Dirt whimpered, and then curled up into a ball, laying on his side.
"I don't know.. Maybe you're right, bro," Brian said, "Maybe it's just a mental block that I need to move past. Cause I DO love you, Dirt. And I DO wanna be with you..." He placed a gentle hand on Dirt's lower leg, since it was all that he could reach.
Again, Dirt whimpered. He wanted to cry, but he held it in. "I don't want you to be uncomfortable, though, dude... I don't want you to be like, peer pressured into it..."
"Nah, dude. I don't care anymore. It fuckin' sucks being just friends with you, man, I miss you! I wanna cuddle you and kiss you and..."
"And fuck him!" Salem added enthusiastically.
"Well. That's not what I was gonna say, but yeah that too," Brian laughed. "What I was gonna say is, I just want to be WITH you, bro. Just... comfortable with you. Not having to hold anything back."
Dirt slowly sat up, looking at Brian who was smiling sheepishly at him. "That's what I want too, bro.."
"Oh my god PLEASE hug or I'll DIE," Salem begged. Dirt and Brian both laughed as they took Salem's advice, finally embracing each other lovingly again. "Yay!!! Love!!!" Salem cheered.
"Uh, Salem.. Do you think we could get a minute alone?" Brian asked, very politely.
"But of course," Salem said with a silly little bow, "I'll go and watch some BCU," he said as he turned and walked out the door, closing it behind him.
"...BCU?" Brian questioned.
"..Babish Culinary Universe....." Dirt answered.
Brian snorted. "Ah."
"So you... wanted some privacy?" Dirt said with :3 and 👉👈.
"Heh. I'm not gonna fuck you while Salem's probably got his ear pressed against the door, if that's what you were hopin' for," said Brian as he caressed Dirt's cheek. Dirt giggled gayly, pressing their face against his hand. "I just wanna be alone with you for a sec. Just wanna enjoy... you..." Dirt melted at that. His eyes fluttered closed as he sighed serenely, putting his hand over Brian's.
"Cuddle moments?" Dirt said, looking at Brian with puppy dog eyes. Brian laughed, and answered by grabbing ahold of Dirt's waist and pulling him to lay down with him. Dirt's arms hugged Brian's neck, and their leg was thrown over his waist, as Brian held him, firm but loving. Safe.
Finally... "I love you, dude," Dirt whispered into Brian's neck.
"I love you too," he whispered back, squeezing them for a moment. "I missed you so much, bro. I missed this... I didn't even have you for very long, but, fuck dude when you were gone, I was so empty. I'm so sorry. Breaking up with you was the biggest mistake I've ever made in my life." He kissed Dirt on the head, and they held back tears as their heart soared, and they felt like they were made of pure light.
Maybe things were finally going to be okay.